Days since last round up: far too long
Doses of vaccine received: still just the one
Best bit of vocab:
Language progress: feeling pretty confident at the end of my time in Paris. I’m now at the end of my major chunk of time abroad - in fact it’s actually just about exactly a year ago that I set off for Germany - and with 5 1/2-ish months in each country under my belt, the idea is that I would be fluent by now. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to describe myself as fluent without some hesitation, and I’ve realised that it’s definitely not as simple as ‘you go abroad and come back fluent’. In some respects I feel like I’ve made huge progress while being abroad, but in others I feel like little has changed since my A-levels. What I can say with relative certainty is that my spoken confidence in French has majorly improved. I’ve been cured of the illusion that I will ever be able to speak French without an accent, or rattle off a sophisticated speech in the same way as a Parisian, but at the same time, paradoxically, that’s given me more confidence in what I have achieved. There are still large gaps in my vocab and idiomatic use of language, but I can safely say that I’m C1, and feel comfortable living in French. As for dreaming, I don’t know if I’m quite there yet …
Reading: L’autre qui danse, by Susanne Dracius
Weather: hot, too hot for a British girl six floors up
It’s been a while since I last wrote, and my last few weeks in Paris seem like a world ago now. More to come on what I’ve been up to since then, but we’ll start from the beginning (which is actually an end), and round off my time in Paris with some highlights from the final fortnight. I don’t think a bit of retrospective perspective is a bad thing here, and with a little bit of distance I can now reflect a bit more generally on the major part of the French half of my year abroad.
The final week especially is a bit of a blur: while I was negotiating the various logistical and emotional challenges of trying to pack my entire life into two suitcases within the limited space of a 10m squared chambre de bonne, heading over to the family’s each evening wasn’t exactly an escape, as I helped them prepare for the move to Brittany for the summer holidays, at the same time as they were getting things sorted for some renovations in the apartment. Swept along with all this, and the new possibilities of no curfew, I somehow arrived at my final few days, and, much as I can only describe au pairing as an incredibly positive experience which I think was a great choice for my year abroad, I couldn’t help a huge sigh of relief and general excitement when the family left for the station on the Wednesday evening, and I was not only left with two days free to enjoy Paris, but also free of childcare for the forseeable future. It wasn’t an especially emotional parting (there isn’t really time for that when you’re trying to get four children and three suitcases into a taxi in the middle of a Parisian side street), and I don’t think I’ll see them as quite the second family as my very first French host family, but I can’t be anything but grateful for the set-up they gave me and how much their support made my experience of Paris what it was.
Celebrations were in order, and some highlights of my very final few days included drinks and amazing food at a nearby Afro-vegan restaurant and rum bar, followed by a typical Montmartre wine bar, and some more relaxed drinks as we watched the sun go down in front of the Sacre Coeur. Nothing original I know, but there’s a reason that the charm of Montmartre is such a cliche, and it’s one of the things I feel most grateful for about my time in Paris - being so close to this cute and vibrant little neighbourhood has made for some brilliant nights out, and all round good vibes. Amidst the chaos of preparations to leave, I still managed to make the most of Paris opening up again, with two late night cinema trips after work, a Friday night out in the Marais (just bars for now, but still lively and a taste of what ‘normal’ Paris feels like), and one last trip to Paucourt, near Montargis, where I was welcomed as warmly as ever by the family I au paired with in summer 2019. I’ll really miss being able to visit them as regularly as I’ve been able to, and it’s been a real highlight of my stay to join them for the weekend like a member of the family.
Leaving Paris is never easy, but I know I’ll be back and it definitely feels like the right time to move on. Although my relationship to the city and my perception of it has changed significantly while living there long-term, it still remains one of my favourite places on earth, and I can’t wait to return with the right people and revisit my regular haunts. I don’t know if I’ll ever come back to settle long-term (despite what I thought when I moved here), but even as a visitor I know it’s a city I’ll spend lots of time in, whatever happens. For now it’s on to something a little different (and a bit more relaxed!), which always makes the departure easier. It’s au revoir to Paris for now, but definitely not adieu.